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by Noam Sain
The Nobel Peace Prize
U.S. Presidency for Dummies
Setting up a home security system
Go to a secondhand store and buy a pair of men’s used size 14-16 work boots.
Place them on your front porch, along with a copy of Guns & Ammo Magazine.
Put a few giant dog dishes next to the boots and magazines.
Leave a note on your door that reads:
“Setting up a home security system”
Hide the decline
Tit for tat