Gnome Sayings

How to treat your wife

Terry might be with us to this day if only he had told his wife about the Magic Basket.

GOP ponders buying Trump a new vacation home

Reliable sources have confirmed that GOP leaders will be offering to buy former president Donald Trump a new vacation home in the location of his choice in exchange for quietly fading from the political scene.

Al Gore creates new line of global warming winter wear

Nobel Peace Prize Al Gore, former U.S. Senator and Vice-President of the United States, and founder and current chair of The Climate Reality Project, today announced his new line of Global Warming winter wear.

Biden administration to rush relief to storm-stricken Texas

As winter descends with a vengeance on the Great Plains this week, The Biden administration is making arrangements to send relief to the worst-hit areas in the form of new solar panels.

Congress establishes Express impeachment process

After failing twice at impeaching Donald Trump, the House today announced a new Express process for targets of impeachment with three Articles or less.

The mule traders

Two mule traders, Curtis and Leroy, saw an ad for a mule in the paper and agreed to buy it for $100.

The farmer was to deliver the mule the next day.

Ad agencies take the high ground

Ad agencies in America and Europe have made the shocking discovery that the best approach to sell to white racist bigots is to feature non-whites and mixed-race couples prominently in all ads.