by Noam Sain
A woman gets home, screeches her car into the driveway, runs into the house, slams the door and shouts at the top of her lungs: “Honey, pack your bags! I won the lottery!”
The husband says, “Oh my God! What should I pack: Beach stuff or mountain stuff?”
The wife yells back, “It doesn’t matter … just get out!”
Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit my best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress, non-addictive, gender neutral, celebration of the winter solstice holiday, practiced within the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion of your choice, or secular practices of your choice, with respect for the religious/secular persuasions and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all…
Whereas, on or about the night prior to Christmas, there did occur at a certain improved piece of real property (hereinafter “the House”) a general lack of stirring by all creatures therein, including, but not limited to a mouse.
Continue reading “The Night Before Christmas, Legally Speaking”
Just before Christmas, an honest politician, a generous lawyer, and Santa Claus were riding in the elevator of a very posh hotel. Just before the doors opened they all noticed a $20 bill lying on the floor. Which one picked it up?
Everyone concentrates on the problems we’re having in this country currently: Illegal immigration, hurricane recovery, and alligators attacking people in Florida.
Continue reading “Let’s Solve Everyone’s Problems at Once”
Barack Obama discovers a leak under his sink, so he calls Joe the Plumber to come and fix it.
Continue reading “Barry the Marxist and Joe the Plumber”BARACK OBAMA: The chicken crossed the road because it was time for a change! The chicken wanted change!
Continue reading “Why did that chicken cross the road? — 2008 version”
In the last six months there have been 292 persons murdered in Chicago, versus 221 killed in Iraq. The leadership in Illinois is all Democrats:
Continue reading “My kind of town, Chicago is”
Imagine for a few moments that you are the human resources director of a major multi-billion dollar corporation. You are sitting in your large, luxurious office when you receive a phone call from the Chairman of the Board of Directors.
Continue reading “Would you hire this man?”