As you may already know, it is a sin for a Muslim male to see any woman other than his wife naked. He must commit suicide if he does. So next Saturday at 4:00 p.m. Eastern Time, every American woman is asked to walk out of her house completely naked to help weed out any neighborhood terrorists. Circling your block for one hour is recommended for this anti-terrorist effort.

All patriotic men are to position themselves in lawn chairs in front of their house to prove they are not Muslims and to demonstrate they think it’s okay to see nude women other than their wife, and to show support for all American women. Because Islam does not approve of alcohol either, a cold 6-pack at your side is further proof of your anti-Muslim sentiment.

It is your patriotic duty to pass this on.