Snow White, Superman, and Pinocchio are walking in the street when they come across a sign: “Beauty contest for the most beautiful woman in the world.”

“I am entering,” said Snow White. After half an hour she comes out and they ask her, “Well, how was it?”

“First place,” says Snow White.

They continue walking and they see a sign: “Contest for the strongest man in the world.”

“I’m entering,” says Superman and after half an hour he returns and they ask him, “How was it?”

“First place,” answers Superman.

They continue walking when they see a sign: “Contest! Who is the greatest liar in the world?” Pinocchio enters. After half an hour he returns with tears in his eyes. “What happened?” they asked.

“Second place,” replies Pinocchio, “but the winner told me afterward that if I vote for him, he’ll close Gitmo, end our foreign wars, make other countries love us, end racial strife in America, reduce the deficit, lower the debt, provide me with cheap healthcare, make certain that everyone in America has a job, stop the revolving door between DC and lobbyists, refuse to sign any bill that contains pork-barrel spending, run the most transparent administration ever, and honor our 2nd Amendment rights. Hell of a guy.”