How much did Santa’s sleigh cost? It was on the house.

Which of Santa’s reindeer are dinosaurs afraid of? Comet.

Why is Santa scared of chimneys? Because he’s claus-trophobic.

How you can tell that Santa is real? You can always sense his presents.

What nationality is Santa Claus? North Polish.

Why did Mrs. Claus get mad at Santa? Because her husband was a flake.

What’s Santa’s favorite type of music? Wrap.

Why is Santa so good at karate? He has a black belt.

Why does Santa go through the chimney? Because it soots him.

What do you call a kid who doesn’t believe in Santa? A rebel without a Claus.

How does Santa take pictures? With his Pole-aroid camera.

What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride? A “Holly” Davidson.

How much did Santa’s sleigh cost? It was on the house!

Why was Santa’s little helper so sad? He had low elf-esteem.

Who is Santa’s least favorite reindeer? Rude-olph.

Why did Santa go to the liquor store? He was looking for holiday spirits.

What do you call Santa’s little helpers? Subordinate Clauses.

Why don’t you ever see Santa Claus in the hospital? Because he has private elf care.