You’ve been a roadie too long when:

  1. You think sleeping inside the console’s road case lid is “comfortable.”

  2. Your ears stop ringing all the time and the monitors seem to need more HF EQ.

  3. You no longer own one single clothes hanger.

  4. You never use the living room anymore because the acoustics suck.

  5. Your welcome mat is gaffed down … so no one will trip over it.

  6. You made a tape of the tour bus engine to play at night so you can sleep.

  7. Your walkman has a sub-woofer, and runs off a 12 volt truck battery.

  8. All your furniture has wheels … (Anvil cases w/ Colson casters).

  9. You’ve re-wired your whole house to use Hubbell Twist-Lok plugs.

  10. You are home for a week before you stop dialing “9” to get an outside line.

  11. Someone on the street gives you the “thumbs up” and you look frantically for the monitor desk so you can give them more volume on their mix.

  12. You completely lose interest in groupies.

HONORABLE MENTIONS

  1. You change the gels on your living room lights nightly … for effect.

  2. Your clothing no longer resides in a dresser, but rather in a duffel bag.

  3. You sleep at home with a Maglite, your backstage badge, and a bottle opener next to your bed.

  4. You’ve actually considered installing a three phase power service in your home so that the lighting and audio are on separate legs to eliminate hum, pops, and buzzes.

  5. When friends stop by you insist on leading them down your darkened hallway with a Mag-Lite, and when they enter the living room you bring up the dimmers.

  6. You built a new home ( which you rarely stay in ) with a long, wide, incline ramp instead of a sidewalk to facilitate EASY load in.

  7. Everything you own has your name and the letters “FOH” stenciled on it in white Krylon®.

  8. Your communications network is a laptop and a pager.

  9. Your favorite incense smells like rosin core solder.

  10. You know all the best music stores to get stuff at … in every town but your own.

  11. When you’re home, you ask your parents what the Per Diem pay is for being there.

  12. Your Christmas lights consists of a truss and a few cans for the reindeer … and a super trouper for Santa.